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ㄷㄷㄷ... 드디어.. 끝! 좀 봐주세요~~
paiwtngo | 2011.08.09 | 조회 460

마지막으로 제가 쓴 글을 올립니다..


여러분이 제가 자꾸만 첨삭 요청하는 글 올렸을 때..


왜 이리 집착하느냐 했지만..


이게 저한테는 참 중요한 시험이거든요..


그래서 결국에는 완성했습니다...


제가 직접 만든 것이니 읽어보시고..


해티즌들의 의견을 들은 결과..


점수 90점 이상 기대해보고..


제 생각에는 fly-flew-flown하고 문단만 명확하게 구별했으면 완벽했을..


그럴 글이었습니다..


 


꼭 봐주세요~~~~


Peter, a 14-year-old boy, unfortunately arrived in the strange island. He turned to and fro but there was nobody in that place. (The horrible anxiety encompassed Peter obnoxiously.) “Anybody here? Please answer me!” Suddenly, a small bee came and whispered to exhausted Peter, “Hey, wake up!” Peter saw it and screamed, “Bees can’t speak!” However, a bee serenely said, “Welcome to Beeful Island. I’m Honey, the leader of bees living in this island.” “Anyway, do you know how to get out of this dreadful island?” Suddenly, Honey angrily said, “This isn’t a dreadful place! This is the island filled with joy and glory! Now, follow me! I’ll show you the place I’m living.” Peter sighed, and slowly walked to the forest where Honey was going. It was so magnificent that Peter opened his mouth and kept fixating at trees all the time. (There were idiosyncratic plants and rather quaint insects.)


After a few hours, they finally arrived in Honey’s habitat. There was a large plain. And there were hundreds of bees flying everywhere. They made an annoying sound which terrified Peter with awe. (made Peter terrify with awe.) “Wow, this is awesome! I didn’t see bees living like this one! They are so lively and brisk!” Honey joyfully shouted, “You finally realized the real glory of this place! Hey, come along! Let me show you something.” Honey flew and pointed at something. “Humans came here last year and left this little box and suddenly (abruptly) disappeared.” Peter saw it and gloriously spoke, “These are the empty bottle and sweet potato seeds! They left some useful commodities here!” He shouted and ran to the field, and joyously said, “Honey, this will be the farm of great sweet potatoes!”


(Next day) Peter dug the land and planted seeds in the land with a shovel (and covered them with mud). And he gave them a plenty of water with a bottle. Then he slept with a warm blanket in the box. He also discussed some interesting stories with Honey and his friends. After few weeks, the large plain was full of mouthwatering sweet potatoes which grew exuberantly. After looking over them, Peter happily said, “I have a great idea to be rescued! If people like pilot (people in planes or aircrafts) see these hundreds of sweet potatoes, they will think that someone is living in this place!” (And) as he predicted, three pilots saw them and discovered Peter. (They landed on the plain and found/discovered Peter.)


When (Peter boarded the plane) and was about to depart, Peter could see Honey and his friends waving at Peter. They were saying (said), “Good-bye, Mr. nicePeter…” Peter smiled, also with some tears in his eyes. While eating sandwiches in plane, he said, “It was terrific.” (Then plane disappeared into the blue sky. ‘mist’ / After a few days, plane eventually arrived in Peter’s home. He recollected his experiences in Beeful Island, and decided to write them as a small book, which is what you are reading now.)


 


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